a place to share ______.: ...whatever the hell I want!

So I realized that I hadn't written in a while. I noticed this because of all of the photos I had saved on my phone from days I should have been uploading them onto my computer. I don't want this to be an overwhelming photo post, so I'll try to limit it to select favorites.

Lately, I've been surprisingly well. I exercise fairly consistently, am becoming more conscious of the things I eat, am aware of the time I waste, but most importantly, I am able to pick myself up when I know I'm in a very low place. I've become more patient with myself and it has really helped my productivity, I believe. I'm afraid of regressing, but I am also hopeful. While it's the fear of regression that lurks in the back of my mind, I have a kind of hope that keeps me going. It's nice. I also noticed that I am more comfortable hanging out with my family and dealing with conflict and criticism. (I just need to make a decision with the whole TEFL thing now.) I think part of the reason why I feel more comfortable is because I am realizing and finding my role in my family. I know that this sounds really late in the game to realize that, but I guess better late than never? I don't know why this has been so important to me, but I guess I just wanted to be in a place where I know that I belong. I wanted to make this family situation work because I realize that my parents don't owe me anything, and that I wanted to appreciate them for everything they have given me, regardless. I think I always felt indebted to them, but I just didn't know how to show my appreciation, which was frustrating for me. It was difficult to do this in a way that didn't impede on my sense of self.

When I was taking a walk one day, I remembered this blog, and it's purpose. Before, I didn't want to expose myself too much, just in case it became famous. Haha! But now, I figure it is my one space where I can really vent anonymously, so why should I limit myself? Maybe if this blog does become famous, it won't be too bad to let people know what kind of a person I am. This is "a place to share ..."